Saturday A. and I traveled to Charlottesville with our best friends S and C to see Melissa Ferrick. This trip had been planned for quite some time as she had cancelled the show not once but twice… I think you all know that I am quite round… there is no hiding a pregnancy… so the concert was very very strange for three reasons.
1. A. bought me a nice dinner down the street so when we got to the concert, I wanted to return the favor and waddled up to the counter to buy our friends and A. a bottle of wine… scary stares ensued… It felt like everyone was staring at me.. I suddenly felt guilty then I got mad.. Didn’t they know I wanted to drink a glass of wine.. that I feel like I have just regained my ability to drink it – but just cant bring myself too. It was a strange moment.
2. I realized on Saturday in the middle of a concert surrounded by lesbians or otherwise open minded folks that this cosmos of the IVP is a foreign concept to many. I have long hair and I’m girly – getting girlier by the day as these pregnancy hormones take over my body. It took awhile after coming out at 16 to accept my identity as a feminine lesbian, but I have and I love it. But in this room I felt a need to defend my pregnancy.. I shared more PDAs that normal with A – saying to the group “Yes, I am a lesbian and yes, I am pregnant” I can’t explain why I felt judged or why I felt like people didn’t buy it… I just realized I felt excluded in a way I hadn’t been counting on. I desperately missed my corner of the IVP universe where TTC aren’t just letters. I just didn’t feel the camaraderie that I normally enjoy from going to a lesbian/gay/bi/trans oriented concert…
3. Suki-dot likes music… Couldn’t stop the kicking if I had tried… up down on the sides all over – It was fascinating… We are going to make a mix and let the babe listen and see if we can recreate the joy with headphones… We think suki-dot likes bass.
In Pregnancy News…
Im 22 weeks today and big as a house… but I realize this house is about to get an addition built and I find that scary. Today I am headed to the chiropractor to see if I can do something about the sciatic pain… This weekend I developed a cankle… just one – because perhaps thats even more repulsive that having two! I am hoping that it might have something to do with the sciatica… Strange you say – well I now have shoulder, back, sciatia, round ligament pain, and a shin splint on the right side of my body. Left side is pain free except for the cankle…. Its all related right? Maybe I need some V8?
Purchases
Today A. bought a stroller from Crai.gslist… an immaculate older model peg pe.rego… looks like it will be a great everyday stroller… we will probably still get a jogging stroller or something like that for urban walking and jogging type activities… But it certainly makes the world much more real… This weekend I bought a new bra… its like heaven… I went up another size… won’t they stop growing soon?
My Belly button
I’ve often wondered if you loose it (popping out like a turkey thermometer) over night or if it is gradual. I think I am getting close so I am going to start taking daily pictures of it so I don’t miss it… Its rather crazy…I’m a bit obsessed with it..
2 Comments
June 2, 2008 at 7:52 pm
firstly….i am so so so so jealous. melissa ferrick – i wish she would come to australia……
i get the wine thing, i held a glass of wine for pcat the other day, while she was putting on Piggy’s shoes, i felt like the whole room was judging me i had to put the glass down on a table to stop the stares!
being visibly pregnant and in a space full of lesbians is weird…kind of like you need a t-shirt to out yourself and feel less out of place. have done the extra PDA thing as well.
taking babies in utero to concerts is twice as fun as empty uterus’s….so great that the baby can react to music that we love too! brain washing can start early!
oh! and belly buttons, i am not sure how it happens, mine is popped out some times and not others, if i am standing up it is there. lying down not there. with piggy if i pushed it would pop out completely inside out! i will be interested to know what you discover with your daily pictures!
June 2, 2008 at 8:28 pm
happy to hear that things are coming along nicely!!